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yuriyurarararayuruyuridaijiken:

Updating this old post with translations for the short on-screen comic:

Comic:

①

Karen & Tsukihi: We’re the Fire Sisters!

②

Karen: Ah! Down the street, it’s that swindler we’ve been hearing about!

Kaiki: Hehehe. What a beautiful day to cheat people!

③

Karen: Want some more?!

Kaiki: I’ve turned over a new leaf.

Kaiki: Let me make amends.

(Book is labeled “Swindle Diary”)

④

Kaiki: Do you know her?

Karen: Who’s this untouched, honest, bright-looking girl?

⑤

Karen: Know her?

Koyomi: Let me try asking Gahara-san.

⑥

Karen: So it was Senjougahara Hitagi-sama…

—-

Audio:

It’s me, Kaiki. ”Kai” as in “shell midden” (kaizuka) and “ki” as in “dead tree” (kareki). Kaiki Deishu.

When I went to buy a new cell phone, all they had were smartphones. Times sure have changed!

But contrary to the name “smartphone,” they’re pretty fat, aren’t they? They’re about twice as thick as regular cell phones, to the point of being bulky.

They’re a pain to put in your pocket, and on the other hand, the screen’s so big that it seems like it’d break easily. Don’t just assume everybody will put on a screen protector!

Good grief, I won’t go as far as to call them “fatphones,” but they’re more like “flatphones,” don’t you think?

Well, in any case, the one thing I don’t want to be is the type of person who’s depended on devices so much and then dismisses them as having gone the way of the dodo or being junk.

Next episode, Tsukihi Phoenix, Part One.

That’s the lesson that I should take away from this incident.

“You can laugh after stealing the first kiss of your only 2 sisters? Are you even human!? You have less integrity than a hamster! This couldn’t be by accident!? You were aiming for it from the start!? You must have done it while she was sleeping in Karen’s case too, right!?”

“No, you’re mistaken. In your case, it was when you were sleeping, but in Karen’s case, it was when she was sick.”

“You’re the worst! Everyone, here is the worst human in the world! Here’s a criminal who sexually abuses his family!”

- Nisemonogatari Volume 2 “Tsukihi Phoenix” Chapter 11

To be honest, Hanekawa told me this once.

During the events of Golden Week.

“Araragi-kun. You might be able to be a star, but you’re unable to be a hero.”

It was difficult to hear.

But her words were true.

Hanekawa’s words were always true.

I’m not an ally of justice.

I’m not an ally of humanity or ally of monsters either.

I’m their ally.

I’m just a regular older brother.

- from Nisemonogatari Volume 2 “Tsukihi Phoenix” Chapter 11

“Karen-chan.”

I said, turning around. Karen was about to sit down where I had been sitting until now.

“Yes? What is it, Nii-chan?”

She said, looking back at me.

“Could you die for me?”

“Yes, I could die for you. So what do you want?”

… Her answer was as expected, but she still looked so cool… You’re definitely a carbon copy of Kanbaru. Really, if she weren’t my little sister, I think I might have fallen for her. If only she weren’t my little sister…

“Then, could you die for Tsukihi?”

“…yes, obviously.”

- Nisemonogatari Volume 2 “Tsukihi Phoenix” Chapter 11 (emphasis mine)

Oh god, Tsukihi is too adorable.

Love the devil horns that Tsukihi’s ahoge causes. Very fitting.